Excerpts from the Becki Bible

So...I carry around a pocket sized notepad in my purse. When something comes to mind, I hear a funny quote, or I just want to write, I pull it out and do so. Here, you can have a little taste from the beginning of December.

December 3, 2009:
"Dey terk his jerb!" -Southpark
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You know what I hate? Douche. Fucking. Bags. Don't be cocky. It's very unattractive. It makes me want to punch you in the face. And kick you in the balls. Why can't guys like that just wake the fuck up and grow a fucking heart?!
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"Emotional nakedness is saying 'I Love You'." -Anonymous
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December 8, 2009
"It means two heart" - "LIKE A GIRAFFE?!" -Andrew and Jesika (ew)
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I hate guys. Really when someone is my really good friend and then they turn into a complete douche...it's really ridiculous. It makes me so mad. And I use the word douche a lot. Anyways. Here's a big FUCK YOU.

December 9, 2009
Just because I annoy the fuck out of you, is it really necessary to be so cruel that I'm close to tears?
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"My ass is twitching. You people make my ass twitch." -French Kiss
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"Just because I rock doesn't mean I'm made of stone." -Jim Carrey
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"Were you raised on a chicken farm? Cuz you sure know how to raise a cock!" -Great Britain
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"I'm just having family time with the faucett." -Kevin Faucett
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"What time is it? My lip is crusty." -Me and Adrianna

December 10, 2009
"Think about it. Bleach is mostly water, and we're mostly made of water. Therefore, we are bleach." -Metalocolypse
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I like blankets. I like orange juice.
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"Oh it's okay, you're not a sex machine...most of the time!" -Lizzie

December 13, 2009
He even WALKS cocky. Fuck head.

December 14, 2009
Dancing Nancies by Dave Matthews....best Dave song ever!
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"Trust me, you'll know what stupid is when stupid happens!" -Emily
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"The key to a woman's heart is an unexpected gift at an unexpected time." -Finding Forrester

December 17, 2009
"They should have cubbies underneath the bus for muslims." -Zack

December 21, 2009
So I'm reading the Secret and I'm trying to be open-minded about it, but it is just NOT working. It says, "Food is not responsible for putting on weight. It is your thought that food is responsible for putting on weight that actually has food put on the weight." Is it just me or does that just sound like a crock of shit?! No matter how many times I tell myself I'm think, if I eat fast food every day I'm going to gain some fucking weight!

[[Unknown Date]]
Iced soy chai: CHRISTMAS IN A CUP!
Jessy Rae took a bullet for my underwear. :)
Kyle: Always there for me.

And the old feeilngs resurface. WHAT. THE. FUCK. Why. Why do I want him so bad? When I can't have him? And why do all the guys that want me...I'm not interested in them?! Well, most of them anyways. One of them has a damn good sporting chance.
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"All guys are douche bags." -Arsen

December 25, 2009
Find someone who thinks the sun shines outta my ass.

December 26, 2009
"We need more pro-Becki songs." -Josh

December 27, 2009
Sunshine by Atmosphere...great song.
These past few days I've been missing my grandma a lot.
Use a 'clear eyes' accent instead!

December 29, 2009
'Dead skin mask' by Slayer. Creepy ass fucking song.