By Myself

I woke up to my mom and Lizzie walking around the kitchen, Charlie crawling all over me, and the other two dogs were growling and playing in the same room. Damn it, I was trying to sleep!

But I rolled off of the couch and wished I hadn't slept by myself again.

As I made better use of myself throughout the day, I couldn't get his voice out of my head. Regina Spektor played from the speakers in my bedroom as I cleaned and everything reminded me of him.

I could see his smile when I would tease him. I could hear us arguing over what music to listen to on road trips. Going for walks in the middle of the night just because we can. Him teaching me how to play video games because I basically suck at all types of video games. Just being with him. I could feel it, all of it.

Sometimes he's so close and yet so far away.