Sunday, January 17, 2010

Unreal

"Depression isn't real. It's just a state of mind. You're depressed because that's how you want to think."

BULLSHIT.

How could something that I've been suffering from since I was thirteen years old, not be real? Are you out of your bleeding mind? No, that's right. I am.
This guy tells me it's my fault that I'm depressed. That I should do something about it.
Does he understand the battle I've been going through?
No, of course he doesn't.
He doesn't understand that my head...IS NOT RIGHT.
Nobody believes me. And it's so frustrating. To the point of tears.
Don't tell me, "Oh you're fine, nothings wrong with you."
You're not me. You don't know what goes on in my head.
I'm a generally positive person. Trust me.
If you knew me in person, I laugh, I smile, I know how to have a good time.
I love with all of my heart.
I'm an awesome person, I'm not afraid to say it. :)
Depression pulls that awesome person down, depression and something else, although I don't know what it is. My brain...the puzzle pieces don't fit. I obviously know I'm not normal and I'm okay with that.
Normal is boring.
I just want to be able to function in society.
Is that so much to ask for?
Don't tell me depression isn't real.
Because if it isn't, then that means that I'm more fucked up than I thought.

4 comments:

  1. I hope that guy kicks a good kick in the a**! That isn't kind to say. I have friends that suffer from depression and I know its not just "the way they think". It is real. I'm with ya girl!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Becki,
    My offer to stand on someone's throat still holds. We can change his perception of reality and depression.
    Be well. Don't give in. Don't let them bring you down. Be loved.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I don't think that person is right, I believe depression is real. But I also believe that you need to do something about it, because let's face it:

    being depressed is not a fun way to live life right?

    Be happy, be you. yes. you. are. awesome!

    loves

    ReplyDelete
  4. Your right. Depression is real, and it is hard to get out of. Just about killed me. (those are the posts that I dare not share..) Hope things look up for you.

    ReplyDelete