Grey

It's amazing how I've done nothing all day,

yet I've managed to go through about fifty emotions.

I was doing just fine. Not great, but doing okay. Going to church every Sunday, going to the Jazz games, hanging out with my friends, going for walks, taking pictures.... And then something came up and now I'm questioning everything. What if this, what if that. I just want to be fucking happy, that's all. And if I get used again, I swear I will fucking tear you apart.

I have so much already. So much to be grateful for, and I'm always looking for more. Always. I don't want to be sober if I have to feel like this much longer. I don't want to wait for a fairy tale. Especially if fairy tales aren't true.

I need some whiskey, and I need to watch Titanic.